The year came in like a rolling tide, in pounding waves that would not subside. So much so we could not fight it or hold it back. All we could actually do in the end was to take the surest and firmest position and stand resolutely in the sinking sand beneath our feet, letting the waves pummel us over and over. Sometimes being swept under by a waves’ full force, tumbling, holding our breath until we resurfaced again, finding air and re-taking our stand.
The dawning realisation there is no boat coming to take us to a distant shore. Beyond the shore is not where we live out our lives. Our times are here in the frothing, crashing tumult of it all.
But we are not alone, we are battered for sure, but not alone. Looking down the shoreline we notice distant dots, also swaying, also bending, also enduring, but still standing. As fierce as the waves which roll in behind them.
The losses came thick and fast, death by a thousand tiny cuts. Or if by not this, then by the relentless sorrow manifest in the lives of our friends. Life-changing accidents. Sudden death leaving families reeling in its wake. IVF again. Cancer again. Addiction again. The odds stacking up against us seared as we are by separation Losses, almost such that they defined us completely. Save, in the end they did not They could not. For silently, out of a banished corner crawls kindness, on her knees inching forward into the light and in her shadow, holding tightly onto her hand for safety emerges a tiny but fierce creature we recognise as Hope.
